I wasn't fatigued or excessively tired anymore. I also looked better. I knew that I'd be dealing with the effects of the attack for a long time and this long-term recovery was in direct conflict with my "jump in and get the problem solved immediately" mentality. I think that the possibility of a relapse scared me enough to listen to those around me.There is something I've wanted to talk about. I guess I've given the impression that everything was wonderful at Central High. That's really wasn't. " I answered evasively. "I know - like doing two women?" She smiled."Well yes (I nodded), then there is one fantasy that really gets me going. It's kinda wild, I bet you won't expect it from me, do you really want to know." Like I didn't already know the answer."Hell yeah I want to know." She stated with piqued curiosity. Throwing caution to the wind I said simply, " My fantasy is to be fucked."There was a moment of silence, she had a confused look on her face; she was trying to understand what. Meredith said she no longer wanted the thug I had grown to be.She wanted the new best friend who was sitting there in the mirror. Shewanted me as her new best girl friend !!!!After I came down from my first excited look, I was very intrigued. "Meri",I asked, "how could I ever be your girl friend." She said not to worry. Mybody and the changes that had taken place over the passed few months made melook more like a woman than a man. She explained that she had tricked me abit--the meds her doctor. I spit the stuff into the toilet and scrubbed my face with tissue paper, so grossed out. I cleaned it off my hands, the smell sickening me again, and scrubbed my lower face with soap and water. It was on my neck, and the top of my t-shirt. I yanked it off over my head, made sure I had nothing to see, and then went back.In the bedroom, I muttered an apology and put on a fresh t-shirt. This session was done; Michael had no interest in doing anything else, including Xbox. They left with my best.
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